When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.

 387

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Why were so many niggers killed in the Vietnam war? Because when the sergeant said to "get down", they all got up and started dancing.

 369

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A man in Amsterdam feels the need to confess, so he goes to his priest. "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. During WWII, I hid a refugee in my attic." "Well," answers the priest, "that's not a sin."' "But I made him agree to pay me 20 guilders for every week he stayed." "I admit that wasn't good, but you did it for a good cause." "Oh, thank you, Father. That eases my mind. I have one more question." "What is that, my son?" "Do I have to tell him the war is over?"

 913

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Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.

 438

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Teacher: "In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia?" Pupil: "Holding up the telegraph lines!"

 435

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