Why did the bald man take up running? To get some fresh 'air.

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Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race. One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds." The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record." So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."

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Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get? A: Mistle-toes!

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The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.

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Fan: "I see you won a silver medal at the Olympics. What's it for?¨" Athlete: "It's for telling knock knock jokes." Fan: "And what's that gold medal for?" Athlete: "For stopping."

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