There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.

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Q: What do computers and air conditions have in common? A: They're both become useless when you open windows.

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The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball." Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"

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UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

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Yo momma so FAT, she can't save files bigger than 4 GB.

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